Vladimir and Estragon are Dead (excerpt)
SCENE: THE AFTERLIFE, A HUGE EMPTY SPACE
SILENCE
| Estragon: | (Quietly) Didi? |
| Vladimir: | (Sighs) |
| Estragon: | (Whispers intently) Didi. |
| Vladimir: | (Impatiently) What? |
| Estragon: | Are you here? |
| Vladimir: | Yes |
| Estragon: | (Agitated) With me? Are you here … with me? |
| Vladimir: | Where else would I be? |
| Estragon: | (Relieved) Good point. (Pause) Didi? |
| Vladimir: | What now? |
| Estragon: | I'm cold. |
| Vladimir: | Cold? I'm cold too. |
| Estragon: | But my feet don't hurt. Why don't my feet hurt? |
| Vladimir: | They don't? |
| Estragon: | No. And my feet have hurt since the day I was born. |
| Vladimir: | That long? |
| Estragon: | Longer. |
| Vladimir: | You can remember? |
| Estragon: | As sure as eggs are eggs. |
| Vladimir: | What else could they be? |
| Estragon: | It's how I knew I was alive. (Pause) Didi … I don't like it here. Let's go. |
| Vladimir: | We can't. |
| Estragon: | Oh, I remember. We're waiting … for him. |
| Vladimir: | No. |
| Estragon: | No? |
| Vladimir: | No. |
| Estragon: | Did he come? Oh, Didi, did he come? Was I asleep and he came? I was asleep and he came. Tell me I was. |
| Vladimir: | No. |
| Estragon: | No, I wasn't asleep or, no, he didn't come? |
| Vladimir: | Oh, you were asleep, as far as one could tell. It may be that you still are. It's even possible we both are, in a manner of speaking. |
| Estragon: | I dreamt I was asleep. |
| Vladimir: | And did you wake up in this (smacks his lips and considers the word for a moment) dream? |
| Estragon: | I did and here I am to prove it. So then, what are we waiting for? |
| Vladimir: | Nothing. It would appear our sins have paid our way and we are free men. |
| Estragon: | So, he's not coming? |
| Vladimir: | He may come or he may go as he pleases. We were never his keeper. |
| Estragon: | (Becoming impatient) So, we can go? |
| Vladimir: | No. |
| Estragon: | (Slowly) No. |
| Vladimir: | (Precisely) There is nowhere to go. |
| Estragon: | There is. There must be. You remember the Mâcon Country. We could go there. The Mâcon Country is still there. You need to have faith in some things. It will be right where we abandoned it. Why would it not be? All we have to do is follow the road. One way or the other will lead us there. Or to Rome. (With assurance) All roads lead to Rome. We could go to Rome. |
| Vladimir: | Assuredly, my friend, we have followed our path and never deviated from it, to the left or to the right, but now it seems that road has reached its bitter end. |
| Estragon: | I'm off. |
| Vladimir: | Fine. Then go. |
| Estragon: | Yes, I will. (Pause) I said, "I'm off then." |
| Vladimir: | Very good. |
| Estragon: | Will you not bid me a fond farewell? After all our years? |
| Vladimir: | Goodbye. |
| Estragon: | Cheerio |
| Vladimir: | Arrivederci. |
| Estragon: | Sayonara. |
| Vladimir: |
Ciao. (Pause) |
| Estragon: | You're still here. |
| Vladimir: | You were leaving. |
| Estragon: | A mere technicality. |
| Vladimir: | Then go. |
| Estragon: | I will. Adieu. |
| Vladimir: | Wait! |
| Estragon: | You want me to stay? |
| Vladimir: | I never asked you to leave. |
| Estragon: | True. |
| Vladimir: | Which way will you go? |
| Estragon: | This way or that. |
| Vladimir: | Such an important decision should be left to Fate. |
| Estragon: | She's not here to ask. |
| Vladimir: | We could flip a coin. |
| Estragon: | A good idea. Well? |
| Vladimir: | Well what? |
| Estragon: | Do you have one? |
| Vladimir: | Not a ha'penny. |
| Estragon: |
Me
neither. (Pause) |
| Vladimir: | We could pretend. |
| Estragon: | Yes, let's pretend. |
| FX: | VLADIMIR PRETENDS TO FLIP A COIN, CATCHES IT AND SLAPS IT DOWN ON THE BACK OF HIS HAND. |
| Vladimir: | Your call. |
| Estragon: | Heads! |
| Vladimir: | It was tails. |
| Estragon: | Shall I go this way then? |
| Vladimir: | No, go the other. |
| Estragon: | (Sighs) |
| FX: | THE SOUND OF STEPS FADING INTO THE DISTANCE. SILENCE. THE SOUND OF STEPS FADING INTO THE FOREGROUND |
| Vladimir: | You weren't gone long. |
| Estragon: | There was nothing interesting that way. |
| Vladimir: | No? |
| Estragon: | No. Nothing. Not a thing. I've decided to go the other way. |
| Vladimir: | The other way? |
| Estragon: | I am still a man. Adiós amigo. |
| FX: | THE SOUND OF STEPS FADING INTO THE DISTANCE – A LITTLE FASTER. SILENCE – A LITTLE SHORTER. THE SOUND OF STEPS FADING INTO THE FOREGROUND – A LITTLE SLOWER |
| Vladimir: | Gogo. |
| Estragon: | Didi. (Pause) I've … changed my mind. |
| Vladimir: | A change is as good as a rest. |
| Estragon: | So they say, Didi, so they say. (Pause) Didi? (Pause) I think I'm afraid. |
| Vladimir: | Fear is good. |
| Estragon: | As good as..? |
| Vladimir: | Insight. |
| Estragon: | An enema more likely. |
| Vladimir: | Has the realisation of our predicament not reached you yet? |
| Estragon: | It seems not. |
| Vladimir: | Can you not see we are dead, my old friend? |
| Estragon: | Dead you say? Dead. We were barely alive in any event. You said I'd been sleeping. Did I die in my sleep? |
| Vladimir: | It seems likely. It's all one and the same. |
| Estragon: | At peace at last. |
| Vladimir: | Unconscious at least. |
| Estragon: | Just when I was getting the hang of waiting too. (Pause) Now what? |
| Vladimir: | What now? Now, I don't know what. |
| Estragon: | Are we in heaven? |
| Vladimir: | Does this look like heaven? |
| Estragon: | I don't think so. How would one know? It's not hell. |
| Vladimir: | Not any hell I know of and we've circled a few in our time. |
| Estragon: | To be sure. |
| Vladimir: | Did you notice anyone on your travels? |
| Estragon: | I was only gone a moment. |
| Vladimir: | It felt longer. (Pause) Well, man, did you see anyone? |
| Estragon: | I'll have a think. (Pause) No, not a living soul, nor a dead one come to think of it. Did you not espy anyone while you were waiting for me? |
| Vladimir: | I did not. |
| Estragon: | Were you waiting long? |
| Vladimir: | Not so long. |
| Estragon: | How long's that? |
| Vladimir: | How long is a piece of string? |
| Estragon: | That long! So, what do we do now? |
| Vladimir: | We wait. |
| Estragon: | Have we not had our bellyful full of waiting? |
| Vladimir: | We must certainly be better equipped than most to cope with its many rigours. |
| Estragon: | Well I've had it with it. |
| Vladimir: | What do you mean? |
| Estragon: | I'm not waiting around any longer. |
| Vladimir: | There's nowhere to go. You went and came back. Twice! |
| Estragon: | I don't have to go anywhere. |
| Vladimir: | You don't? |
| Estragon: | No. I'm going to stay here but I'm not going to wait. |
| Vladimir: | Not wait? |
| Estragon: | No. I refuse. |
| Vladimir: | It's a novel proposition I grant you. (Pause) Have you started? |
| Estragon: |
In
a minute. I have to prepare myself. I'll tell you when it's
time. (Pause) |
| Vladimir: | Is it time yet? |
| Estragon: | Nearly. |
| Vladimir: | What are you waiting on? |
| Estragon: | I'm not. |
| Vladimir: | You've not started without telling me? |
| Estragon: | (With some relish) The urge … was irresistible. |
A bit about the writing of Vladimir and Estragon are Dead
Who in their right mind would sit down to write a sequel to one of the
greatest plays ever written? It smacks of arrogance. Or at least
overconfidence.
I'd just finished The More Things Change, a novel steeped in the
world of Samuel Beckett and it's obvious that all of that was still going
around in my head when I got the opening line. There was no image, merely
a voice and then more voices. As I started writing I kept what I was doing
to myself. I'll be honest I never thought it would come to anything, a bit
of self-indulgent fan fiction at best, but the words kept coming and I kept
writing them down. A week later the first draft had been completed and it
needed precious little editing.
The question then was what to do with it. I did the same a
Gustav Holst
once he'd finished The Planets, I stuck it in a drawer and forgot about it.
Living Will
Vladimir and